Into the River

VORLESEN

Into the River

 

When I was sixteen, I was told

To shut my mouth until I’m old

A writer, they said, has nothing to tell

Before being fifty and won’t sell

 

When I grew fifty, people said

You had your life, guy, no regrets

The world by now belongs to the young

The POC, queer, the beaten and hung

 

Fair enough, I said, just what shall I do

With all my unpublished and overdue

Novels, stage plays, poems and songs

Where in your world do they belong?

 

For them, they said, there ‘s no more need

You know, all old white men shall bleed

In fact, you, Dylan and Pink Floyd

Are dodderers with hemorrhoids

 

I understood and at home tried to burn

My stacks of manuscripts, but got to learn

From my own children that this is forbidden

Smoke kills the environment, Dad. So of course I didn’t

 

I jump into the river

Like an ox reveling in his own blood

For life is more than silver and mud

I jump into the river

And as I see I cannot swim

I sing I sing I sing this hymn

 

I tried to peddle all of the stuff

But people yelled at me: It’s enough!

Your work is evil and not of worth

Full of strong language and nasty words

 

In our world we’re nothing but kind

Okay, I said, I leave it all behind

Just tell me, what can I do for my living

They joked: Come back next year at thanksgiving

 

Maybe we’ll find something to spare

A rotten pumpkin, an apple or pear

When will you accept that you belong to those

Who’ve stolen from others? Man, lower your nose

 

I consulted my children: When, please, did I steal?

They said: Dad, do you have any wound to heal?

If not, you’re no victim and therefore filthy

For who is no victim, is per se guilty

 

I see, I answered, I always thought

The fact alone that nobody bought

My literature, at least not for a fair price

Was quite a capital sacrifice

 

They said: Don’t forget that you enjoyed fame

Which you stole from the better, that is your shame

I said: Pardon, and if I was the better one?

They said: Dad, for this they can charge you, hold on!

 

All the better, I barked, for that makes me a victim

Oh Dad, they said, what an embarrassing dictum

Just leave and be glad if you’re not persecuted

Others have for much less been muted

 

I jump into the river

Like an ox reveling in his own blood

For life is more than silver and mud

I jump into the river

And as I see I cannot swim

I sing I sing I sing this hymn

 

I took my toothbrush and underwear

And left in direction of here or there

Nobody‘s waiting for me anymore

A good rhyme here would be: except for that whore

 

But I guess the word ‘whore’ is already taboo

And besides, it wouldn’t even be true

Truth is: I’m sitting here, writing this song

And realize, I knew it all along

 

I never was a child of my time

I always had huge walls to climb

Telling the truth felt as much as a crime

As, after Auschwitz, writing a rhyme

 

Now I’m confident to leave all behind

And be able to tell what I have in mind

And hope that my children will one day forgive

That I stopped being brave and started to live

 

I jump into the river

Like an ox reveling in his own blood

For life is more than silver and mud

I jump into the river

And as I see I cannot swim

I sing I sing I sing this hymn

 

Musik Tim Krohn

Text Tim Krohn

Gesang, Gitarre, Keyboards: Tim Krohn

Kontrabass, Gesang, Xylofon, Zieharmonika: Anna Trauffer

Aufnahmen und Mix: Philipp Schaufelberger

Mastering: André Pousaz

Aufgenommen im Frühling 2024